Silence

This week has been a task filled week due to Delta Zeta responsibilities. Due to that, I have very little time to think about the sadness and heart-issues I am struggling with right now...until bedtime. I find myself avoiding sleep (what I am currently doing) so that I can avoid silence and time for me to think. In reality what I am avoiding is intimate time with God. Silence is when he speaks to us, its when we can truly grow near to him. I don't know what fear I have of that, maybe that it involves a lot of sadness or fear that my plan isn't his plan (sinful in itself).
I must pray against the fear of silence so that I can grow deeper to Christ. Below is an article that really has opened my eyes silence, I hope God can speak to you through it as He did to me.

www.biblicalspirituality.org/silence.html

Our God is Jealous

For a few months now I have been ignoring God. For so long I have desired to be consumed by him, to be filled by him. But he has said "I can't do that with this in your life." My stubborn world-filled lifestyle continuously shoved that to the back of my head and convinced myself that everything was good and pointed to him when it wasn't. Ignoring him for so long had its consequences, he recently ripped that area of my life away in a vicious manner. He wants me so bad that he had to do something drastic to shift my focus towards him.
This week I am praying that all distractions be taken from me so that my heart can focus on him so that I can be healed.

"You shall not make yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God."

Comforting Words

I saw this on an old youth group friend's facebook. God truly prepares me for the things he has in store for me- good or bad. This is where my heart is right now and I pray that he can continue to "disturb" me until my heart is set on him, never wavering.

Disturb us, Lord, when
with the abundance of things we possess
we have lost our thirst
for the waters of life;
having fallen in love with life we have ceased to dream of eternity

I catch myself falling in love with this world and creating idols of things that are momentary. My heart may be broken but for once I know that only HE can repair it.